Growing Pains

"The journey of parenting is more about OUR growth as people 

than our kids growth. "

 

There's such a big focus on the firsts with kids. 

First word. First step. First food. First birthday. 

They don't tell you to pay attention to the lasts. 

The crazy thing is you rarely know it's the last. 

You don't know it's the last bath until a few weeks go by and you realize they now only take showers. 

You don't know it's the last time you will rock or lay with a little one to go off to sleep, until one night they say "I'm a big girl now Mommy. I can go to sleep by myself."

You don't know December 8, 2020 will be the last time you will drive him to school. 

Until January 26th, 2021 when school returns in person and you stand on your driveway with your cup of coffee as he drives off. 

I've found raising kids to be an adventure I'm not sure anyone is ever really prepared for. 

Yesterday I listened to an author say parenting is made to "shape us, transform us, disrupt us, and create space for growth. But with growth comes growing pains." 

The author challenged me to ask myself

"God gave me this kid - what is he growing in ME? "

It seems I keep getting circled back to the idea that when things get hard, I should look in the mirror first. 

I'm going to admit, given the hurdles I've encountered parenting this one - God must be trying to grow a whole forest in me. Not just one tree. 

I love him deeply and fiercely. 

He is however all my hardest personality traits. 

I spent the better part of his childhood trying to disciple, discipline and channel those traits. 

A few years ago I realized, I really needed to disciple, discipline and channel those traits in ME. 

He's deeply in this independent phase. 

I can see that we rushing through many lasts here in the years to come. 

When I'm being honest with myself, I see me. 

Rushing to leave home. 

Craving the separation. The independence. 

So today I'm taking a deep breath. 

I'm trusting that I've given him roots that will survive the wings he's rushing. 

I'm savoring every "Mom I'm here. I love you." phone call. 

I'm soaking the way just for a few minutes, when he first wakes up, he still looks exactly like the four year old version of himself. 

I'm looking in the mirror and asking myself "What is God growing in ME" as we walk this season. 

Mama Warriors, whether you are firmly in the planting roots season, or struggling through the gifting wings, I challenge you to remember that with growth comes growing pains. 

So if this season feels hard, know it's supposed to be. 

God is growing something great in YOU. 

You sent Yesterday at 3:45 PM