Light

 "Jesus gives us peace but we are responsible for maintaining it."

Peanut and I are embarking on a "1980's Summer."

At the beginning of 1985, I turned 10. The big double digits. Just like Peanut.

We started this summer reading "Are You There God, It's Me Margaret" (followed by a trip to see the movie) and the American Girl book on puberty.

10 seems to be the year of big questions.

I'm fighting to be the FIRST source of information. I want to give good information before someone else gives her wrong information. But more importantly, I need to be the person that can talk about ALL the messy uncomfortable things.

Being the third kid, having two "adult" (I use that term very loosely) siblings.........Peanut is exposed to a lot more hard conversations than I would like.

She carries worries of the struggles we have with her big kids.

She's acutely aware of how the dynamics of our home are shifting.

About a month ago, Peanut began to have trouble going to sleep. I finally unearthed that she (much like her mother) lays awake at night worrying about all the things.

Spinning the worst case scenarios.

Peanut and I have had some tough conversations lately.

They all have had the same theme.

Thoughts left in the darkness are just that. Dark. They feel alone. They are scary. They are overwhelming.

In order to move forward, we have to be willing to bring our problems into the light. In the light, we find support. In the light things seem not as scary. In the light, there is comfort.

In the light, together we can work on a plan. We can't always fix things. That's a hard lesson when you're 10. Or 48.

But we can learn that sitting in the light together is far better than sitting in the dark alone.

I recently bought Peanut a lamp for her bedside table as a visual reminder that there is always the option to shed light on darkness.

Mama Warriors, some topics can be hard or uncomfortable to talk about. I've answered WAY more questions about body parts and body changes than I knew existed.

We have to be the people who can have these conversations. Because the minute some topics become ones they don't talk about with us........it's a slippery slope. The list grows.

What's on that list will remain in the dark.

Where there's darkness, there's no light.

Our kids need light to be healthy. To be happy. To be whole.