Above Ground Pool Life

 "There are people who have it all together and everything works out. We are not those people. We don't have an inground pool life. We have an above ground life." (Mike Heck, The Middle)

It seems when life is particularly crazy I take on some cleaning challenge. Which given the daily state of my house is almost comical.

This week I decided I'd try the "stripping" thing I've seen online. You basically put hot water, borax, washing soda, and laundry detergent in your tub and then put the clothing you want to strip. I chose Xman's baseball gear - go big or go home right?

I followed the directions and every hour I went and stirred these clothes in my bathtub.

In the videos I watched, the water gets nasty and debris is in your tub. You then wash the clothes in your washer and they are "stripped."

I'm not sure what I was expecting but Xman's baseball gear is still filthy. My bathtub is not overly dirty.

Basically, like always, I'm not a Pinterest, Tik Tok challenge kind of girl.

Our house is the kind of house where you have to go old school. If you want something cleaner you can't soak it and leave it. You have to scrub it.

We are not in ground pool kind of folks.

We are Walmart metal frame pool all the way.

I often expect an inground pool kind of life because I seem to be surrounded by images of it. Moms who make it to everything. Families with the perfect family photo shoot. Marriages who are constantly out on date nights exuding joy. Kids posting gushing "I love my mom" posts.

We are messy over here. At least once a week one of the teenagers gets out of my car and slams the door with no "thank you for driving my cranky rear end around." We are happy to find a half hour to watch a program before sleep together and even then one of us typically dozes off. I can't get my kids to let me take a picture and then goodness gracious should you post it , there will be a tirade. At least one appliance isn't working all the time. Let's not talk about the consequences if it rains.

I guess the bottom line is I expect life to not look like life.

If I'm not careful I can spend all of my time angry, sad or disappointed I'm not living an inground pool life.

Instead of embracing the joys of the above ground pool life.

God has not forgotten about me. I know that because every day has challenges. So, He's growing me. Constantly.

Like any good parent, He's not okay letting me sit around sipping sweet tea in a lounge chair. I'm up using the skimmer trying to keep frogs from living in our above ground pool.

This morning an adorable 7 year old greeted me with a super scary boo excited to spend the day with me. A very tall moody 16 year old said "I love you Mom" just before I drifted off last night. An aloof 18 year old sent me a text this week with a picture of herself drinking a coke, a connection. A loving husband assured me that even though I'm currently limping and sleeping on a heating pad, I am loved deeply.

Above ground pools build connections.

It's a lot of work and it's never easy. It's not glamorous or fancy.

"The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort and convenience but where he stands at times of challenges and controversy." (MLK Jr)

Mama Warriors as you embark on this festive and fun holiday, I challenge you to rise above complaining about how this may not be an inground pool Halloween. We all may be creating above ground pool fun this year.

Maybe that's why COVID hasn't been as challenging for some of us- some of us are used to above ground pool living? Some of us are used to things not working out, plans changing, expecting the unexpected.

Change shakes us up and grows us.

Let's embrace that different is okay. Maybe even better.

(Published October 2020)