Lounge Wear

 The Word became flesh and blood,

and moved into the neighborhood.

John 1:14 (MSG)

I have this revolving Amazon wish list where I stash things I've seen listed as "good" or a deal. A few months ago, someone I follow raved about this "lounge wear."

Good for sleeping. Good for hanging around the house. The advertisement clearly shows someone going out in it. I'm guessing the Bucks and Target.

My pajamas are dismal and my hanging around the house clothes all have holes from either wear or training the dog.

The Princess gifted me a set of this "lounge wear" for Christmas.

Now, the model looks ready to hit the town.

I look like I'm missing my fanny pack and am late to the 4:30 buffet.

I stood looking in the mirror trying to decide if I wanted to laugh or cry.

Why is it I can buy the same outfit as the cute model and still look NOTHING like the cute model?

I took my track suit looking outfit and put one foot in front of the other and walked my neighborhood while I pondered this phenomenon.

A fanny pack might have helped.

I was reminded that often my emotions are controlled by my expectations.

I expected this two piece outfit to transform me into something I'm not.

I'm not the mom/wife who looks well put together.

Maybe because I'm not?

Maybe my asset is I look like an approachable mess.

Mama Warriors, as we close out 2022 and are tempted to want to be new or different people in 2023, let's take a moment to appreciate the enough that we are.

Right here in our lounge wear.

Simple Christmas

 

The king is coming.

Why are we not all singing loud for all to hear in the aisles of Walmart?

Perhaps because you, like me, often get off track on what the "musts" are in this season.

The only real must is to be IN the light.

Spend time with Him.

You were made to tell and talk of Him.

You were made to worship.

Mama Warriors, I think sometimes we complicate the simple. Anyone else an over thinker here?

You don't have to be a biblical scholar or a person who has it all figured out to share the light.

In fact, I'm finding that by bringing people into my mess, stepping into theirs, that's where He's transforming me. Transforming them.

You just have to be willing to be a womb.

A space where love grows.

A vessel for Him.

As you spend these next few days surrounded by friends and family (functional or dysfunctional), let me challenge you to be a womb. Be a vessel. Be a place where love grows.

Let love shine.

Sit next to the relative who talks too much (It's probably me). Carry the packages out to the car for a family with littles to buckle in car seats. Hold the baby so the new mama gets to eat hot food. Refill grandma's sweet tea.

You don't have to shove Jesus on folks. You just have to let your light shine so others can see what He looks like walking here on earth.

Love God, Love people.

Simple Christmas.

Published 2018

Christmas Is an Inside Job

 "Preparing for Christmas is an INSIDE job this year."

Last week, amongst the chaos, the strand of lights in the middle of the tree went out. Brand new lights. Just threw the box away.

For a few days they flickered.

Peanut : Mommy did we buy flashing lights for our tree?

Nope.

Then they went totally out.

Each time I walk past this tree, I think "SAME tree. SAME."

My head is in Christmas mode. The top of me. I'm making the lists, thinking about all the things, checking off all the boxes.

My feet are in Christmas mode. The bottom of me. I'm doing the things. Wrapping the gifts. Creating the magic. Attempting the family fun.

Somewhere in the middle, I'm not feeling Christmas.

Somewhere in my heart, the Christmas lights are flickering.

I listened to a sermon this morning that talked about how usually we have OUTSIDE sources to ready us for Christmas. We gather with friends and family. We attend advent services. We busy ourselves with traditions.

This year, for me, and many, Christmas is an INSIDE job.

It's up to me to "let every Heart prepare Him room."

If I want to RECEIVE the joy of Christmas this year, I'm going to have to make some space for Christmas in my heart.

I'm going to have to be responsible for keeping my own Christmas lights on.

I've been reading and seeking how you prepare Him room in a tough season.

" Thomas Kinkade answers the question, “How do we prepare Him room?”

“By cleaning out our inner lives, deliberately putting away the resentments and the distractions that clutter our hearts and minds, and by giving a priority to forgiveness and reconciliation in this season of relationships. By rearranging our obligations to make sure there’s room for prayer and reflection in the midst of all the busyness. By decorating our hearts with thoughts and attitudes that are worthy to welcome a king – love and joy and peace – and by decorating our lives with loving deeds."

Cleaning out.

Making space in our day for prayer

Checking our heart attitude - looking INSIDE

Loving deeds- looking OUTSIDE

At that first Christmas God showed up BIG for those who made space in their heart for Him.

I firmly believe that He wants to do the same for you and for me.

Mama Warriors, last night I dragged 2 of my 3 somewhat willing children out to see the "Christmas Star."

Whether we saw it or not, really isn't the bottom line.

We went searching.

We were available.

We were willing.

We showed up.

This week, I challenge you to prepare Him room by searching, being available, being willing, and showing up.

Christmas 2020 is an INSIDE job.

But shouldn't it be every year?

Shouldn't we own our own part in preparing our heart for Christmas?

Search.

Be available.

Be willing.

Show up.

Published December 2020

Christmas Feeling

 "Joy is God and God is joy and joy doesn't negate all other emotions - joy TRANSCENDS all other emotions. Joy is a flame that glimmers only in the palm of the open and humble hand."

Every year I enter into Advent with the goal of finding the joy in the Christmas season.

Every year by the time we hit the week of Christmas, Christmas often feels more like a burden then a blessing.

I look at our calendar and try to figure out how to balance the expectations of those who live outside our house with the mission of those who live inside our house.

As these thoughts were swirling, I stumbled upon our elf Snowflake.

Snowflake arrived the year Peanut was born. She's soft and cuddly as elves of 9 month old babies should be.

My favorite parenting mantra is "When I know better, I do better."

Snowflake came with no rules - no book.

She's allowed to be touched, played with and loved.

She does not "watch" over Peanut. Her job is not to see if Peanut is some elusive naughty or nice. She doesn't report to Santa.

Her job is solely to bring a little concrete joy into our days during December.

Peanut is GOOD.

She's GOOD because she's made by God in His image.

She's GOOD because she's wholly loved by me, and others, authentically for who she is.

There's nothing she can do that will take Christmas away from her.

Nothing.

Jesus is coming regardless of her behavior in December, or any other time.

She will wake Christmas morning with presents to celebrate that.

No matter what.

A younger me bought an elf with a book and followed the rules. Sort of odd for me as rule following is not my norm

A me who knew better, and did better, changed it to fit my Christmas message.

I was reminded this morning that what Christmas looks like isn't decided by someone else.

I'm the contributor to His story.

I get to decide to sort the burdens and the blessings.

I get to decide whether you can touch the elf or not.

Mama Warriors, as we enter this last week of magic making, I encourage you to remember that YOU are the author of how this Christmas goes.

You get to decide what lands on the pages of your story book.

What you say yes to.

What you say no to.

As an adult, I realized that I don't remember the specifics of any childhood Christmas.

But I do remember how Christmas felt.

How does Christmas feel in your home?

Look for Jesus

 Kris Kringle: "Oh, Christmas isn't just a day, it's a frame of mind...and that's what's been changing. That's why I'm glad I'm here, maybe I can do something about it."

Today got off to a rocky start. Peanut woke this morning and didn't see me in our sleepover room and began to panic. By the time she got to the dining room where I was, she was beyond upset.

We snuggled, got breakfast and lit a candle to regroup.

The candle sparked and caught my dining room tablecloth on fire.

Peanut had an emergency and we couldn't get into the bathroom causing her to have an accident, which she hasn't had in years.

All before 9 AM this morning.

In case you are wondering how our day is going.

I've promised her once we get the house cleaned and some chores taken care of, and some fresh air breathed, that we will snuggle up and watch Miracle on 34th Street. We listened to the audio version of it last week and she loved it.

If you haven't seen it, go with the original classic one.

Essentially the identity of Santa Claus is put on trial. Is Santa real?

Through a media driven court case, the question becomes personal for one little girl and her mother.

I love the movie for many reasons.

I think we can all relate to having our identity questioned at some point.

Are who we say we are?

If you haven't had one yet, then maybe you haven't turned 40.

I'd hesitate to hedge that we have that same court case with our own self more often than others.

It's a story as old as time. A story that at heart can take us back to the cross.

Is "I am" who He says He is?

The thing about the Miracle on 34th Street that always strikes me is that once the mother and daughter open their heart to the IDEA of believing, their lives begin to change.

Once they believe in Santa, it changes who they are. It changes how they see the world. It changes how they behave.

I think our experience with Jesus is supposed to be the same. Once we believe, it should change who we are.

It should change how we see the world.

It should change how we behave.

The question then comes - would we recognize Jesus when we see him?

Are we looking?

Mama Warriors, I think we are all looking for HOPE in this season.

I think we are all searching for something to hold on to, something to believe.

We are all preparing for a day of Christmas. Wrapping the gifts. Buying the groceries. Making the arrangements.

I think we've missed the identity of Christmas.

Christmas is a frame of mind.

Christmas is embracing the identity of Jesus.

Christmas is always looking for Him.

Christmas is hard this year for many. Christmas looks different this year for many.

Christmas isn't some orchestrated few hours once a year.

Christmas is a frame of mind.

Let's embrace that this year.

Let's believe.

Let's look for Jesus.

Published December 2020

A Christmas Carol

 "There comes a point when we move from I would stand by you to I would march for you. Not only will I quietly lend support from the sidelines, but I will take up the banner."

Peanut and I have been listening to the audio version of A Christmas Carol this week. She loves the Grinch aspect that Scrooges heart grows during the story. That Scrooge, like Grinch, learns to love and be loved.

Charles Dickens wrote A Christmas Carol in response to the conditions in England at that time. He had read a government report detailing the life of the poor and was appalled. Rather than writing an article, he turned to a fiction story to depict how people viewed the poor and what he thought should be changed. He hoped to move the hearts and feet of those in his community.

Dickens went from lending support from the sidelines to carrying the banner.

This morning Peanut and I lit the fourth candle of Advent, love.

I've been thinking a lot about the kind of love that Christmas represents.

In sermon recently I heard a friend say that "Jesus loved those in the margin."

2020 for me has highlighted people in the margin.

I've spent a good bit of this year reading and learning and soaking up the various sides of current events.

I read something that suggested for a length of time when learning about a new issue, you should remain silent. You should let those who are educated share. You should let those who experience it share. You should be quiet.

2020 to me has brought out knee jerk reactions in many of us I think.

As a community we've been quick to post a status about where we stand on this or that - without ever walking in the shoes of those the issue really applies to.

We've made decisions about people in the margin without ever sitting quietly there.

As I type this, I'm listening to my husband cough. It's a brutal, relentless cough. I'm checking my texts for the pulse ox numbers that I depend on to make decisions.

I'm trying to wrap my head around how my community in general can be so abrasive with their opinions about the virus. Because you got it and it was just a bad cold, or not even that. Because it's not an issue unless it's personal.

Because only a small percentage of people die.

The people in the margin.

I think this level of thinking applies to so many things.

2020 has highlighted many social issues.....equality for people of color, sex trafficking, COVID19, LGBTQ community, law enforcement, homelessness and more.

I've been reading and learning and sitting in some of these communities.

Silent.

But I don't think we are meant to be silent forever.

When we are educated. When we feel a deep tugging for a social issue. When we are no longer an outsider but a person of the margin too.

Then we move from silent support to carrying the banner.

We move from sitting in the margin to marching for those in the margin.

I firmly believe Jesus not only loved those in the margin but he fought for them.

He stood up, despite the displeasure of anyone else, and he said "I will march for you."

Mama Warriors, let's make space this season for the those in the margin.

Silently.

Let's sit with those who are different than we are and let's learn.

Let's become educated before we march.

But when we are ready, let's have the courage to go from reading the government report to writing A Christmas Carol.

Let's move from support to carrying the banner.

Let's look at that fourth lit candle today and embrace loving people.

I think we do a decent job as the church of loving God but we've got a ways to go on loving His people.

His people are the people in the margin.

Published 2020

Let's Be Light

 "You are responsible TO others not for others."

Murphy and I are OLD friends. This week I decided to clean out our pantry, freezer and fridge before the holidays. By Wednesday I had us down to two days left of food with everyone eating something different at every meal. Xander was quarantined for precautionary reasons but had no symptoms. I was planning to do a big store run on Thursday.

Cue positive Covid test for Sweet Daddy and quarantined for the rest of us.

We've been so blessed with helping taxi hands. My sister generously offered to come out here and pick a very large Walmart grocery order for me yesterday.

I ordered what I could to be shipped, and then all the fresh stuff she picked up.

At the last minute, I added a tin of the cookies to my pick up order. I dunk them in my sleepy time tea. I ordered the family size tin. Because sharing is inevitable here.

There was a large list of substitutions, a few items out of stock, and then this tin of cookies replaced my family size one.

It's smaller than my hand. It has 4 cookies in it.

I'd like to think if the Walmart shopper had a note from me that said something like " Dear Shopper, My husband is very sick with covid. I'm at home quarantined with 3 children. One of whom was supposed to have an amazing week of getting his driver's license, working a fun seasonal job, working out with his friends and is less than thrilled. One of whom can't process that her Daddy may not be able to celebrate Christmas with us next week. I need ALL the things."

I'd like to think if he/she read my note, that they would have found all the things.

I'd like to think if they knew my story, they would have found me a family size container of cookies. Or multiple tins of 4 cookies each.

As I looked at my tin of cookies this morning, I began to think....

Do we only make space for people when we know the whole story?

Are we the Walmart shoppers who look at the list and think "why don't they come get it themselves? they get what they get?"

We have a few people in our life that are VERY difficult to communicate with.

I've been really trying to create space for them. I don't know what it's like to carry what they are carrying.

I don't know the weight of their burdens or their depth of their story.

I've recently been on the flip side where I've been harshly judged for choices I've made. By someone who doesn't know the weight of my burdens or the depth of my story. By someone who assumed that my choices were a reaction to them rather than a response to my own knowing.

Mama Warriors, over the next week perhaps you will gather with difficult folks. I find that the people that frustrate me the most are somewhere on my family tree.

We feel like we intimately know them but I would hedge that we don't.

Let's create space for each other.

Let's be people who find the family size tin of cookies because it's what people need.

Let's give people what they NEED rather than deciding what they deserve.

Let's be LIGHT.

Published 2020

Antibiotic Ointment

 "Stop waiting for someone else to say that you count, that you matter, that you have worth, that you have a voice, a place, that you are called. Didn't you know, darling? The One who knit you together in your mother's womb is the one singing these words over you, you are chosen."

At the end of a very long day Thursday, I was eating chicken and dumplings soup on my couch. Somehow, I managed to spill some just below my lip and it burned off the skin. I know, skills I have.

My house seems to eat things and the neosporin that is supposed to live in my medicine cabinet was missing.

Last night my husband made a Walmart stop while out taxi driving kids. He texted "Need anything."

In mom fashion, I never remember myself and said "No."

Sweet Daddy came home last night with this box.

I'm going to confess, I may have shed a tear or two over this box.

You see, as Sweet Daddy came home with that box, I was covered in vomit. Again. Our wee one has caught the latest kid funk.

There's no moment where we don't feel seen, heard or appreciated more than when our kids are sick. We are helpless to make them better but somehow still tirelessly doing laundry, making ice chips and holding little electric blanket bodies.

As I sit this morning, sipping tea, making ice chips and washing laundry........I'm looking at our randomly lit Christmas tree and the newly wrapped gifts under it.

In this season, more than anything, I want to give people the gift of being seen.

Of being authentically loved for who they are.

I know we've all opened a gift at Christmas time and had that same puzzled thought - do they even know me?

It's hard sometimes to meet people where they are.

To love people with what they NEED rather than what you or they want.

All my parents of teens, say "Amen?"

What if loving people well is showing up with the box of triple antibiotic ointment instead of accepting the "I don't need anything?"

What if loving people well is setting boundaries?

What if loving people well is saying "this is my thing, let me serve you"?

What if loving people well just means sitting in their mess with them for a bit reminding them that they are never alone?

Mama Warriors, as we enter this last week of what I call utter chaos, let's slow down a bit.

Let's leave white space to be able to lean into His tugs and nudges.

Let's not just buy things to buy, but let's be givers of the triple antibiotic ointment.

Let's meet people where they are, love them how they need to be loved.

Published 2019