"Peace isn't the absence of distractions or annoyances or pain. It is the finding of God; finding peace and calm IN the midst of those distractions, and annoyances, and pains."
Confession. I love Christmas movies. Give me all the Hallmark, Freeform, Lifetime Christmas movies. I love them all.
This drives my teenage children crazy. They say extremely nutty things to me like "But Mom - you already know how this is going to end!"
But I like the journey. For two hours (those pesky commercials), I travel with that sweet girl as she wrestles with who she is and who she was always intended to be.
This theme of not being authentically who you were created to be runs deep in the Christmas movies.
There's a big piece of me that soundly relates to struggling with the knowledge that who you are is not who you were supposed to be.
Over the last 5 years, God has taken me on a spiritual journey. It is not one I would have ever willingly signed up for.
While I wish deep in my soul I had the faith of Mary, that resolve to say "Yes, Lord" to whatever crazy request He has of me. I don't always.
I'm going to confess. I was most certainly dragged on my journey. I was trucking along eating my spoon fed religion, falsey thinking I was rocking this mom gig, staying way in my comfort zone.
My health journey, my parenting journey, my wife journey, my daughter journey......all the puzzle pieces of my life aren't so separate it seems.
As I flip through my well loved, covered in notes and highlighting and stars Bible this morning, I can see my journey.
I listened to a sermon this week where the pastor shared something like this
"The closer your connection and relationship with Jesus is, the more authentically true you are. The truest version of yourself is there - close to Him. You were made to know, to tell, and to talk of the Lord."
Let that soak a moment.
The truest version of yourself is the one that is authentically close to Him.
In the pages of my Bible, I can see visually my journey to my more true and authentic self. It's found because I've been forced to question everything.
I've been forced to ask the hard question "What would it look like for the Lord to grow me?"
It looks messy I tell you.
Like the middle of the Hallmark movie. Where you can see them making the mistakes and you cringe. You worry - about her, about the people of this sweet town, about the possible loss of this Inn you've come to love.
Even though you know it's all going to be happy by the 2 hour mark, you still worry.
Even though I know the cross is coming, the Resurrection, I still worry. When the baby is born in the manger, I'm hooked. But the journey is scary.
Even though I know that He intends all things to be done for the good of His kingdom, I still worry.
I look at my Bible this morning though and I think man, what a journey.
This oversharing place I've come to - it's my true authentic self. I'm made to tell and talk of the Lord.
I'm made to share with each of you my messy.
I'm made to remind each of you that the journey is hard. Your hard is hard.
This time of year when we feel guilty for not feeling the Elf joy every moment of every day. That's hard too.
Mama Warriors, I remind you this morning that you were made to be your true and authentic self. That self that has a connection and relationship with Him. You were made to tell and talk of the Lord.
You were made to love first.
That self should be messy. It should be imperfect. It should struggle.
It should journey.
I read our Bible verse this week out loud and my little one got so excited " I learned that in Spark!' she exclaimed (church)
"And he will be called Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace."
May we all be that excited this week as we spend time in the light growing closer to real Peace.
Originally published 2018
No comments:
Post a Comment