Toilet Paper

 "The people of God are called to be people who receive the outcasts and the outsiders, not create them."

This picture was taken just a few minutes ago in my hall bath. The bathroom that belongs to my two teenagers.

Now, I have been carrying my own toilet paper in and out of there for TWO days now.

I'm a huge fan of Everybody Loves Raymond. There's an episode titled Baggage where upon returning from a trip a suitcase gets set between the first and second floors on the landing. Raymond, and his wife Debra, have a 3 week standoff over the suitcase. Not arguing about - just letting it sit there, waiting for the other to take it up the stairs.

I'm not sure if my two teens know we are in a standoff but I'm not replacing toilet paper in their bath. I'm not throwing away those 3 rolls (the girl scout in me isn't keeping them for some future project either).

I listened to a sermon a few weeks ago in which the preacher said :

"Parents emphasize PROTECTION over PREPARATION."

I've been soaking that as I look at these toilet paper rolls.

Have I been busier protecting them from the world chaos than I have been preparing them to be a light in it?

Have I been busier protecting their childhoods than I have been preparing them to become responsible men and women?

We are a generation riddled with helicopter parenting. We are a generation that is parenting from a place of fear. We are a generation that protects more than we prepare.

The bottom line is we have to trust that God is protecting them.

It's our job to PREPARE them to be Godly men and women, and TRUST that He's got them covered.

Part of preparing them is teaching them that you have to be responsible for your own mess. Both literally and figuratively.

I tell my kids all the time, in life, you have to learn to deal with your own crap.

That's just the bottom line.

And preparing them for that means that often I have to be okay with them being in uncomfortable situations and not rescuing them.

Being stuck without toilet paper is so minor in the grand scheme of things BUT I hope it teaches my kids that they are responsible for their responsibilities.

It's really that simple.

If I don't want them to feel entitled in the big, I can't enable them to be entitled in the small.

Mama Warriors, it's often so much easier to rescue them. To not hold them accountable. To protect them from the consequences of their actions.

If we want them to be responsible in the big, we have to require them to be responsible in the small.

From my experience, they'll balk, tell you no one else's mom does it this way, loose a few more privileges and get on board. (results may vary )

But then, they'll be people you want to spend time with. They'll be people others want to spend time with. They'll be people of God who know how to walk challenges and so they'll be a comfort to the broken. They'll receive the outcast and the outsiders instead of creating them.

And when you visit them in their first home, perhaps there will be toilet paper. (originally written May 3, 2018)

Written May 3,2018